June 29, 2011

Divinorum

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Music in my head: Kaneda- Forgive me first father (our blood shall free the earth)
Today's weather: Cold and Sunny.

It’s been entirely too long. My days are melting into each other, the cycle repeats, and repeats, and repeats. And then all of a sudden, just for ten little minutes, it stops.

I was sucked into an alternate reality by an unstoppable force, and that force was me. I watched myself walk through a tropical jungle in my living room. Sunlight trickled down to the forest bed through the branches of colossal white sheet metal trees. Three giant faces spanned my sky, illuminated by the soft light, the faces of the gods. I cowered in worship. I spoke to them in a strange tongue, and I understood everything I said. They did not, and they laughed. Man’s glossolalia, God’s gibberish.

I walked into a temple through the sheet metal trees. As I strolled in, an ancient device whirred to life. It broke the absolute silence that preceded, and commanded my complete attention. It was a conveyer belt made of stone, and it went round and round and round. As if guided by voices, I climbed on it, sat down, and waited in eager anticipation.

Sitting on the living room floor, I saw myself move forward on the conveyer belt. I sat frozen to the floor when I saw my body being cleaved in two. I felt my insides being split apart, but when I looked at myself, I was whole. But I knew I was not. I was on the conveyer belt, split longitudinally, joined at the top of my head. Sunlight entered me, and energized by the millions of photons that hit my insides, I started spinning. I was like the hands of a clock in fast forward, conjoined at my head. I went round and round for seconds, minutes, hours. The belt inched forward, and I was on it, spinning like a CD.

I did not know how much time had passed. Gradually, I stopped spinning. I had reached the end of the conveyer belt. And in the most intense moment of my life, my body was rejoined. I walked out of the temple. The forest was fading away. I walked into the living room and sat down next to myself. I looked at me, and acknowledged my presence for a fleeting second. And then I was gone, only I remained.

The gods had descended from the heavens, they were merely human now. A faint afterglow lit up the place. The only remnants of my sojourn in the jungle were cold sweat that had completely drenched me, and a feeling of euphoria, mixed with slight bewilderment, mellowed down by drowsiness. The dream had passed, but reality was still a haze.

My sweat evaporated as I lay under the draft from an over-enthusiastic Air Conditioner, and soon, I was cold. I wrapped myself up in a blanket and curled up again.

Now, the cycle repeats, and repeats, and repeats.